Don't lose any sleep tonight [Your end of 2017 goals]

November 9, 2017 by 4 Comments

Right so I was actually gonna write another ginormous shitpost but I didn’t know if that’d be a good idea, so I wrote this instead. Not as ~juicy~ (I hate that idiot word too), but PROBABLY MORE USEFUL. I dunno, maybe you enjoy reading about me being a crybaby? Let me know x
Anyway. You know what I love doing? Helping people when I’m trying to sort my own shit out. Need an ego boost? I’m here, you fucking beautiful non-snowflake. Need a pep talk? I’m your man, let’s get your shit together. Think you’re being a cunt? You probably are, let’s figure out what you’re doing wrong.
I thought about telling tell you my own end of year goals, but who cares about me, right??? Instead, I’ve used my time to SELFLESSLY compile a list that you, yes you personally, should make your end of year goals. Gawd, the things I do for this shitty ass blog.
There’s basically just a month and a half left of 2017. Gasp. Yes, I know, time is a man made concept. ‘New year new me’ is some bullshit. But I think we can all agree that there is a certain catharsis that comes with the end of a year, with a brand new calendar.
Without further ado.
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Things 2016 taught me

January 2, 2017 by 1 Comment

2016 was a shitty year. I’ve had some of the best days of my life, and some terrible ones. The world has seen a political shitstorm and many lives have been taken. Changes have occurred, and some people are depressed because they have realised they’re exactly the same person they were 12 months ago. People have come and people have gone. Well, not for me. But for some.
This was a weird transition into the new year for me.
So, instead of lamenting over things that went wrong, things that I want to keep in 2016, and simply remembering specific events, I’m going to think about what I want to take with me into this year. I’m – gasp – actually celebrating it for once.
Here are the things I’ve learnt, and the things that I realised are important.
1] Priorities
You should never be torn between the most important thing in your life and something that pales in comparison. If you are torn, then both of those things are as important as each other. Going to that get-together on Saturday might seem important to your social life right now, but in 10 years, will it matter if you gained a better social standing at the expense of getting a first in that exam, or keeping the person you love happy? The answer is no. Put things into perspective. Read more

Battering ram

December 8, 2016 by Leave a comment

2016 was a bit of a shitstorm, to say the least. And we’re either going to let this asshole of a year barge its way into 2017, or we can say our farewells and leave it behind.
December is the transition month, and thankfully it tries so hard to round our shitty years off on a good note. Here’s to appreciating all the work December does for us, you da real MVP.
1. Christmas
Obviously. Christmas lights in London give me all the feels. Christmas movies, Christmas jumpers, Christmas music in Tesco, Christmas drinks everywhere. Although to be honest the Starbucks eggnog latte is horrendous. Don’t buy it.
2. Cold, wind and rain
Bad weather means you have an excuse to stay indoors and say no to everybody who wants to go out. But some of us genuinely like the rain and an all round dark atmosphere, whether we’re goths or we like that it increases the cozy factor. Or both. Thanks Winter. But no thanks for the 5am ice scraping. And please, no snow.
3. Big Fat Quiz of the year
Honestly, it’s the best thing about winter and I look forward to it all year.
4. Boxing day sales
Because?????? Waking up on a cold morning, no work to do, no commitments, just open up your laptop and start buying things you don’t need with money you don’t have. Or, if you’re an animal, you can leave your house and slither through the smallest gaps in Westfield like the rat that you are. That was mean. I hate clothes shopping, and clothes shopping on boxing day is the fourth circle of hell. Read more